Published on April 2, 2009 By whatshesaid In Life

The monotonous rhythm at home was killing me, I had to get out.

I packed my gym apparel and headed out. The sun was in my eye, and from the corner of my eye, I saw blue.
A blue Citroen Xsara. P-E-N. My heart sank. The sky started to cry so I hurried along and hailed a cab.
"Sunway Pyramid." He sped off as the little beads of water hit the windows angrily.
With my earphones plugged in, I pondered about that little blue car.
I was pretty sure he isn't allowed to get to me anymore, Why did his car bother me ?

I reached my destination, got down, and went straight to the gym.
Got my towels, signed in and went into the changing room.
Selected a cubicle, and noticed that for some reason, the girl next to my locker was staring at me continuously.
I put my bag down and looked at her. Like a zap, her extremely familiar face registered in my brain.
She too, looked at me and stared at, as if she was studying my face.
"Lynn." Oh crap oh crap she remembers my name but I don't remember hers, was it cherry or cheryl or-
"Sherril! Hi!" I smiled at her. I started to feel uncomfortable, this was part of my past I didn't want to remember.
"How long have you been a member here?" she asked me.
"Only about a month or so. You?"
"Just about the same time as you, roughly a month or so as well. How did you come here, walk?"
"Nah, I took the cab."
"Next time if you wanna come here, just let me know, I could give you a ride."
"Really? That'd be great, thanks. We culd come here together some time as well."


(Pause)

My mind went into overtime, I thought hard.

"Please don't ask about him, please don't ask about him, please don't ask about-"

"So how's Heidy ?"

Great.

"Um. (Hesitant silence) He's fine, his birthday was yesterday."
"Oh really?"
"Mmhmm. And how's Eugene?"
I'm guessing that by all the stories H told me about his previous housemate, they wouldn't still be together.
True enough.
"Oh. Um. He's in New Zealand."
"Oh right, okay."

I regretted asking, how stupid are we to ask each other about these two persons, and opening up wounds.

"Hey I gotta go alright? I'll catch you some time soon."
"Sure thing yeah. Take care then, see ya."
"Bye!"

I sat in front of my locker and changed into my gym gear silently and mindlessly.
Of all the people to meet and to bring up...
I stalked out of the changing room.

 

I spent 4 hours in the gym today as opposed to the usual 2.
I doubled everything I did. I went to yoga, and then pilates.
I wanted to go for aerobics as well but I don't think my body's up for it by then.
Pilates made me frustrated. The inhaling and exhaling, that was the taxing part.
Not the stretching, not the lifting. The breathing exercises required so much patience that I couldn't afford.
I had alot of pent up energy and too much to  make up for, Pilates weren't helping at all.
I very nearly got up halfway and left the class, but I stayed and finished it.

I should have been done by then, I should have gone for my shower and headed home.

But I didn't. I couldn't.

I went for another round of weights, another round of treadmill, another round of biking.

By the time I reached the stretching machines, I was in a mess.

I bent over and my face hidden from view, overdue angry and helpless tears started flowing relentlessly.

... I wish.

My poker face plastered on, I got everything over and done with, I showered, and I left.

It has been a long day.

“Every writer is a frustrated actor who recites his lines in the hidden auditorium of his skull.”

- Rod Sterling.


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